We nominated 800 critical data elements. Now every report is “critical,” every request is “urgent,” and our CDE review is a monthly ritual of renaming columns. How do we stop the madness?
Reply: You have CDE inflation. Start a CDE diet and cap the list to the few that change decisions or prevent fines and demote the rest. One definition per CDE, one named owner, one authoritative source, and quality targets people can read without a microscope. If a candidate does not affect a real decision, it goes to a parking lot with a review date so feelings survive while scope shrinks. Turn on runtime checks where each CDE is born and surface lineage where people work. Collect with validation and sensitivity tags. Connect to master entities so customer means the same customer. When the count drops and decisions speed up, celebrate with a cake named Fewer Better. We replace blame with evidence and pastries.
The closing paragraph of the internal report read like a line from a political comedy: If the Galactic Empire can be felled by a missing red flag in a personnel file, what hope do mere corporations have?
💡Satirical commentary created for educational illustration. This work is unofficial and unaffiliated with Hasbro, Inc. or Takara Tomy.
ST. HILARY, OREGON – A verdict has been reached in the unprecedented trial
SwitchBot has unveiled the "Kata Friend," a robotic teddy bear equipped with cameras and Large Language Models to "read the room" and comfort owners. Privacy advocates are thrilled to finally have a gadget that combines the warmth of a hug with the data collection practices of an interrogation room
Human handles feelings, snacks, and the sentence you needed to hear. Algorithm handles calibration, calendars, and the memory of every promise made since 2019.
